As usual, these films leave me gobsmacked. "Mommy." That brought tears. After my husband began to get weary of asking for my hand in marriage, and me telling him I didn't think I wanted to get married (again), he decided to take a job in another state and move away. I remember the Saturday morning, almost 31 years ago now, when I seriously thought about his proposal, knowing I would lose him forever if I let him go. I asked myself a question. "Do I see him staying with me if I ever get breast cancer and have to have a double mastectomy?" Funny question, but I was still a young woman. I unequivocally knew the answer to that question. I had no doubt. Yes. I married him, not knowing I would break my neck and have two brain surgeries which meant his caring of me became absolutely necessary to my day to day existence. I've never felt a moment when he resented this...only love and care. I'm beyond grateful for my choice that Saturday morning. I picked up the phone and said, "Yes" to him.
Thank you for sharing this Linda. I'm glad you listened to that younger self and had an accurate hunch about your future husband. It's beyond warming to hear how he's showed up for you, no doubt a natural extension of his love. Toast him tonight for me, in thanks. xo
I felt like it was an invasion of your privacy to read your comment, but of course I knew you wrote it to share.
Kimberly’s writing and her ever accumulating archive of work , has a way of encouraging self expression. No judging aloud. She opens the door and welcomes you in, a fire burning in the hearth. two comfortable chairs beckoning you forward; have a seat , tell your story, or perhaps just feel comforted by listening to others.I think there are more than a few of us here, fortunate and blessed, that can say we have been held together by the sheer force of love from another human ( and our pets).
Wow, reading this has brought such warmth to my morning. Here's to your husband and to you, Linda.
(Like Lor, I felt somewhat intrusive reading this but then I couldn't stop, and it's honestly made me feel so emotional. Different circumstances, but I called off my relationship with my now-wife very early into our relationship because I was still emotionally bleeding from something prior, but my instinct reverted that decision very quickly and it's honestly the best decision I ever made. Never a day goes by where I am not grateful for the love and care and companionship we found together.
And also like Lor says, Kimberly enables such honesty and sharing here. It's quite magical. Thank you, Kimberly.)
So extraordinary these relationships. I've mostly been alone in my condition because it's so hard on people. I have so much respect for these partners and carers.
Hard on people!? What about hard on you!? There's something so wrong and maddening about what you just said. Sure, the unpredictability, the even violent nature of your epilepsy isn't for the faint of heart. But feeling you navigate them largely on your own is an insult on top of Grand Mal insult. For every one that shared in this episode, there are countless more who don't have "that person" and our healthcare system only exaggerates this dilemma. Caregiving or care training should be built into our health plans.
“To witness the quiet heroism of compassion….” There isn’t another human on this planet that has witnessed and practiced quiet heroism with more love and empathy than you dear Kimberly - once again these stories open my heart to the sheer enormity of light and kindness present in a world that is so often closed, dark and cruel - beautiful is insufficient a word for what you do!
I'm immensely touched by your reflection Susie, and I'm ever thrilled to hear when I viewer experiences this work as a revelation of light and kindness. I've heard many others who are afraid to dip their toe in because "it's sad! it's about illness!" and therefore miss the immensity of the goodness in these stories, in adversity itself. xo
To have so little fear in the midst of these trials is really a testament to unconditional love--the power it has for healing--even when a cure is not possible. Where there's love, there is wholeness and healing and peace. Thank you for the humble way you let these people tell their own stories. They all shine their own light.
So true Ann. Reminds me of the quote by Dr. Rachel Naomi Remen: "The power to cure was a small part of my power to help" and “Fixing is too small a strategy for loss. I can only cure a small amount of disease, the rest needs to be held."
So very true. Most of us are healed & enlivened by being seen and accepted for who we are. You’re so good at this, Kim. What was really fascinating about this project was the way that the questions were not heard—only the answers—which were very beautiful.
Thanks Ann, I think an advantage in this doc-series was the duration of time we spent sharing, over two years in total, and largely because the pandemic forced us into this particular style of Q&A. Everyone recorded in the privacy of their own spaces, no film crews, just prompts and lots of time to reflect on them.
Gosh, knowing that these little episodes can inspire extra hugs and extra love you's—now that put a smile on my face. Thank you for being so open to receiving their truths.
I am constantly in awe of the strength and grace with which the people in your Unfixed doc series vids display — both those needing care and those supporting it. It’s truly beautiful stuff.
As usual, these films leave me gobsmacked. "Mommy." That brought tears. After my husband began to get weary of asking for my hand in marriage, and me telling him I didn't think I wanted to get married (again), he decided to take a job in another state and move away. I remember the Saturday morning, almost 31 years ago now, when I seriously thought about his proposal, knowing I would lose him forever if I let him go. I asked myself a question. "Do I see him staying with me if I ever get breast cancer and have to have a double mastectomy?" Funny question, but I was still a young woman. I unequivocally knew the answer to that question. I had no doubt. Yes. I married him, not knowing I would break my neck and have two brain surgeries which meant his caring of me became absolutely necessary to my day to day existence. I've never felt a moment when he resented this...only love and care. I'm beyond grateful for my choice that Saturday morning. I picked up the phone and said, "Yes" to him.
Thank you for sharing this Linda. I'm glad you listened to that younger self and had an accurate hunch about your future husband. It's beyond warming to hear how he's showed up for you, no doubt a natural extension of his love. Toast him tonight for me, in thanks. xo
I just did, Kimberly…and he appreciated it! So do I. Thank you.
I felt like it was an invasion of your privacy to read your comment, but of course I knew you wrote it to share.
Kimberly’s writing and her ever accumulating archive of work , has a way of encouraging self expression. No judging aloud. She opens the door and welcomes you in, a fire burning in the hearth. two comfortable chairs beckoning you forward; have a seat , tell your story, or perhaps just feel comforted by listening to others.I think there are more than a few of us here, fortunate and blessed, that can say we have been held together by the sheer force of love from another human ( and our pets).
I am glad you have found your significant ‘one’.
A hearth. Yes, this is how it feels. So many beautiful glowing faces, passing the talking stick. :)
Thanks, Lor! So true...others' willingness to be authentic and share their struggles. encourages us to share our own.
Wow, reading this has brought such warmth to my morning. Here's to your husband and to you, Linda.
(Like Lor, I felt somewhat intrusive reading this but then I couldn't stop, and it's honestly made me feel so emotional. Different circumstances, but I called off my relationship with my now-wife very early into our relationship because I was still emotionally bleeding from something prior, but my instinct reverted that decision very quickly and it's honestly the best decision I ever made. Never a day goes by where I am not grateful for the love and care and companionship we found together.
And also like Lor says, Kimberly enables such honesty and sharing here. It's quite magical. Thank you, Kimberly.)
So extraordinary these relationships. I've mostly been alone in my condition because it's so hard on people. I have so much respect for these partners and carers.
Hard on people!? What about hard on you!? There's something so wrong and maddening about what you just said. Sure, the unpredictability, the even violent nature of your epilepsy isn't for the faint of heart. But feeling you navigate them largely on your own is an insult on top of Grand Mal insult. For every one that shared in this episode, there are countless more who don't have "that person" and our healthcare system only exaggerates this dilemma. Caregiving or care training should be built into our health plans.
“My mommy is the sun, the water and the air for a flower…and I am the blooming flower.”
William’s words have a simplistic beauty, but watching him say the words, is a deeply profound experience.
It's like you say in your essay on sentimentality - we belong to each other. ❤️
"You have created such a safe space for me to exist in." 🧡🧡
All of these words and comments are so incredible and moving. Why can't these people be running the world and spreading care instead of destruction.
May this be a truth instead of a utopian fantasy some day. ❤️
“To witness the quiet heroism of compassion….” There isn’t another human on this planet that has witnessed and practiced quiet heroism with more love and empathy than you dear Kimberly - once again these stories open my heart to the sheer enormity of light and kindness present in a world that is so often closed, dark and cruel - beautiful is insufficient a word for what you do!
Thank you for sharing - so much! 🙏🏽
I'm immensely touched by your reflection Susie, and I'm ever thrilled to hear when I viewer experiences this work as a revelation of light and kindness. I've heard many others who are afraid to dip their toe in because "it's sad! it's about illness!" and therefore miss the immensity of the goodness in these stories, in adversity itself. xo
To have so little fear in the midst of these trials is really a testament to unconditional love--the power it has for healing--even when a cure is not possible. Where there's love, there is wholeness and healing and peace. Thank you for the humble way you let these people tell their own stories. They all shine their own light.
So true Ann. Reminds me of the quote by Dr. Rachel Naomi Remen: "The power to cure was a small part of my power to help" and “Fixing is too small a strategy for loss. I can only cure a small amount of disease, the rest needs to be held."
So very true. Most of us are healed & enlivened by being seen and accepted for who we are. You’re so good at this, Kim. What was really fascinating about this project was the way that the questions were not heard—only the answers—which were very beautiful.
Thanks Ann, I think an advantage in this doc-series was the duration of time we spent sharing, over two years in total, and largely because the pandemic forced us into this particular style of Q&A. Everyone recorded in the privacy of their own spaces, no film crews, just prompts and lots of time to reflect on them.
Another heart moving video, thank you Kimberly.
The people who give care are truly heros
Amen Teyani. Thank you for brining your heart to the hearth. xo
I love these interviews. Today's was a beautiful reminder that we all have some sort of health struggle and we must remember that day to day.
It also made me give my hubby an extra hug and my sister an I love you at the end of our call.
Beautiful work, Kimberly, and what courageous folks to share their personal stories.
Gosh, knowing that these little episodes can inspire extra hugs and extra love you's—now that put a smile on my face. Thank you for being so open to receiving their truths.
Simply this: restacked! You continue to break hearts with your own.
Thank you Mary.
when I say my heart breaks
I mean it breaks like a wave—
as if exhausted
by its own separateness
it gives itself back to the whole
- Rosemerry Trommer
each of these stories is a testament a small miracle thankyou
What a beautiful way of seeing it. Love how you think Appleton.
AND the “blooming flower” says, thank you from ALL sides of my heart
Thank you so much for the mention ❤️
You're welcome Josie!
I am constantly in awe of the strength and grace with which the people in your Unfixed doc series vids display — both those needing care and those supporting it. It’s truly beautiful stuff.